Some lessons learned

Today marks 35 years of my life and I’m taking a moment to reflect on it all. Please take the following with a grain of salt, as I’m still figuring things out. But, with age I have grown in audacity. So fuck it, here’s what I’ve learned so far…

1- Your family is either batshit or on the spectrum of it. No family is spared. You’re not special.

2- Money is evil. It’s a terrible incentive. It costs you everything and distracts you from what’s important. Try not to get obsessed.

3- Eat a carrot. That’s for me. I need the reminder.

4- Who you were in high school is who you were in high school. That’s it. But if you’re selling pyramid scheme products to people on Facebook, you were the popular girl weren’t you?

5- Life in and of itself is complete. You don’t need to get married, buy a house or have kids. Choose your own adventure.

6- Confidence is sexy. Give a fuck what size pants you wear!

7- Don’t be shy. Unless you’re 12, you’re wasting your life and opportunities. Take what you want, just don’t be a dick…as she takes the last slice of pizza

8- If your partner is fumbling with your bits…tell them. Life is too short for bad sex.

9- Don’t feel bad for being selective. Life is too short to be charitable with your time.

10- Your body is not a temple. It’s a vehicle. Enjoy the ride!

11- Change is the only constant. Resistance is futile, so try to accept that we are always in flux. Be glad that you intersect with others for moments in time. Those moments make our lives memorable.

12- The grass is not greener on the other side. Every decision you make comes with some good and some bad. How we see it is all relative.

13- The most powerful thing you can do is not care about something any more. It’s fucking liberating!

14- Your body will start hurting and that’s apparently normal in your thirties and beyond. Especially if you live/dance like I do. FML.

15- True romance is not spoken. It’s silent. But sometimes when I fart and I hear a laugh, it has a sound.

16- Laughter is better than any yoga, kale smoothie, or 10,000 KM run. I’m betting on it as my healthy choice. We shall see if I outlive you fit mofos…outlaugh, I already have.

17- Travel. Locally or internationally, leave your comfort zone, meet interesting people. Eat strange foods and open your mind. There are so many ways to live and be happy. It would be a shame to only know one.

18- The more I learn, the less I know – gotta give my mate Anthony Bourdain credit for the inspiration

If any of these points resonated with you, let me know. If you found it funny, awesome. Cheers to more years!